hi there

i feel uneasy. uncertain. restless. uncomfortably unknowing directions and paths. unsettled. complexities of thoughts and emotions. unsure with no stability to rest my feet or prop my soul. i tug at my own leash but it refuses to respond, choosing instead its own, unseen, unfathomable path. or having a path chosen for it. matters not.

feelings are complex issues to deal with. especially when the situation refuses to unveal itself and at least give you the comfort of knowing what feeling or emotional reaction needs to be manifested or dealt with. emptiness and voidness. rawness and gnawing. anxiety and agitation. disquietude and inquietude. mental malaise.

fatigue.

funny what drives people. one may lack the energy to step away, yet have the drive and motivation to keep going. paradoxical. conflicting. mutually existing dualities. emptiness and voidness is worse than direct pain and hurt.

don't want to wake up another morning only to be disappointed again by the void.

lack of control is unbecoming.